July 2013 - The Art School Modelling Sessions

​

My journey into modelling started in the early part of 2008, after many years of writing to different artists / photographers,and always getting the standard "Sorry, not at this time" I found an artist who was actually interested in using me as a subject for a study they were doing after I applied to their casting call. This is where "Just For Today" came from, my 1st ever piece of public work. This session gave me the confidence to grow as a person, and accept my body as it was.

​

Roll on to July 2013, I secured a life modelling session with a Bristol art school and I was booked in for 3 sessions trail.

​

Apart from my work, modelling for a local artist a few times, once for a photographer (clothed) and once for a painter, you would think it wouldn’t be too bad to pose for a group of people that I didn’t know and the chances of never meeting them again....... You would think I would find it easy, mainly because I might come across confident and all my nude works here._ _What I didn’t take into account, the few people I have worked with before I have got to know, so being around them, working with them made it easier. I felt confident in myself to be “myself” in front of them.

​

The 1st session

​

I have to admit walking up the stairs to the gallery where it was based, I could feel my heart in my mouth, I really thought everyone could hear my heart beat. I felt scared and very unsure, but I know it was too late to back out, they believed I would be suitable for the class, after all they had booked me.

​

My heart was racing and I had a hundred thoughts running through my head, what if something embarrassing happened? Would I be able to hold the pose long enough? What poses should I do?

​

When you work one to one with someone it’s a lot easier as you discuss what Image they are hoping to achieve from the session.

​

The two hours began, as I got into my first pose, I heard a male artist say “I’m not going to draw this model, I’m going to move” which he did, he moved to the other end of the room where the female life model was. I know artist only want to draw a certain shape or person, even so, to hear this, made myself confidence go lower than the foundations of the building. I continued on through the first half of the session, but then all I could think was, do these other artists feel the same, but are just stuck here now as it’s too late to move?

​

The second half came, this time the female model and myself changed ends of the room, I suppose there were about 20 artists at the session, when the second half of the session started, there were only four artists left at the end of the room where I was modelling, I continued on but throughout  the session I couldn’t help but think, “these poor artists are stuck down here with me, sure they would rather be up the other end of the room with the others, they are probably only staying here out of politeness and to help make me feel not so bad.

​

As this was the first time I had ever modelled for a group, I was really unsure how it would go. I was nervous and very apprehensive, but the session did go the way I thought it would. I did come away thinking, that maybe modelling for a group isn’t for me, that the poses I did were all wrong. I was the wrong body shape and colouring.

​

II did contact the person that booked me as I wanted to know if there was any feedback given from that evening. I was surprised when the response I got was a positive one. I was given the opportunity to cancel the next two sessions I was booked in for, if I felt I didn’t want to do them. I decided to go ahead with the next to session after talking to the person who booked me and a close friend.

​

​

The 2nd Session

​

I was feeling really nervous as I couldn’t get the first session out of my mind. I wanted to do a good job. I have always had an interest in life art  figure art and I wanted to help an artist capture an image, hence the reason I wanted to get into modelling in the first place, plus we all come in different shapes and sizes, I am tired of seeing men and women portrayed in a certain way, Men, chiselled jaw, dark hair, muscular body, and the same for women, Tall, slim and big boobs. We are not plastic but it seems most artists/ photographers tend to use the stereo type male and female that we get bombarded with on TV, Films and magazines, hence the reason, for my nudes on my page and for me wanting to life model, I am far from that image.

​

The room was set up differently this time, the female model and I were in the same section of the room, so the artists were sat all around, and so to a degree it was hard to tell who the artists were drawing.

​

Once it was ready to start, I could feel my heart beating and racing, this just continued throughout the whole session, I did the poses, which I hope the artists got some decent works from them. It’s hard to tell as I never got to see the works and believe it or not, I was too shy to ask if I could see the drawings they had done. What I love about artists is that everyone sees something different when they are creating their works, some of us see the same things; some of us see something totally different. One of the reasons I enjoy creating my own art work / photography and seeing so many others.

​

I wasn’t sure how many artists actually did any drawings of the poses I had done that night. But I did come away feeling a little more positive about the experience. There were a couple of artists that came over to me and thanked me for my time.

​

The 3rd / last Session

I did my last modelling session. Completed the 3 sessions I was booked in for. I would like to say that at all sessions the tutor running the group has always put me at ease, which has always helped, despite me having the heartbeat of a scared rabbit.

This was the best out of all 3 I have done; this was the last night of the summer term, and starts back up in the autumn, who knows if I will be asked back for next term or not.

I came up with a few different poses which I felt confident in holding the position for the time required. Again I don’t know how many artists draw any of the poses I did as the room was set up the same as the time before, so you couldn’t really tell who was drawing who, plus I was concentrating on the pose I was doing and hoping that nothing embarrassing happened, as most men would agree, sometimes the old man down stairs has a mind of his own, I have also never really noticed until that night just how much a man’s penis changes shape and size in a two hour period with the change in temperature.

 

I seemed much more relaxed, (even though I sometimes felt my heart was going to explode from chest with nerves, and on occasions I could feel the odd droplet of cold sweat fall from my armpit, maybe it was because of the layout of the room that the other model & myself were modelling from, or maybe knowing it was my last 1, not really sure. Again, a couple of the artist came over and thanked me for my time.

I came away feeling positive about the session; these three sessions have been a big learning experience for me, which is always a good thing. One thing I do wish is that I would have been brave enough to have asked the artists if I could see some of the drawings they had done.

One thing I do know is that, it’s a lot easier modelling for someone who you know wants to work with you, or create your own works.

I have no idea if I will be asked back to model for the group or not, but I will continue to create my own “nude” – “life” images as the funny thing is they tend to be my most popular works I create, and I will always take up an opportunity to work with any artist or photographer in the future if they wanted to work with me.